Post by Lilifred on Jul 6, 2010 13:26:00 GMT -5
Anyways there's only so much job hunting a girl can do in the day. In the meantime I've been wasting time admirably!
This is an incredibly lame (but fun!) concept I picked up from a friend back in Jr. High- the idea is to take a bunch of songs from musicals and rewrite the lyrics (sometimes extensively, sometimes barely at all) to suit other characters and then arrange them as some sort of horrific Frankenstein story.
SO. The plot of Kamil te Kar: The Musical is that Miss Cadence Greystone- holiest of holy Paladins- sells her soul to the mafia to save her brother's life. Initially, she is disgusted by her new coworkers but eventually she learns of their hidden humanity through a series of rousing musical numbers.
I've only a few done so far. If you want to add any songs to the project, feel free! There are definitely some characters in the Kamil that I am not familiar enough with to attribute music to, so have at it!~
The Paladin’s Ultimatum
‘Lovely Ladies’ from Les Miserables
*As Cadence makes her way to Erikson’s apartment, she hears whispers in the street*
BYSTANDER
I smell mob debt
Smell it in the air
Think I’ll cut my losses
And leave this alley clear
BYSTANDER 2
It’s that young man
The one with all the smoke
Young man Erikson
He’s ill begotten folk
BOTH
Break some eggs you’re caught with all the yoke
*she knocks and her brother throws open the door, hugging her desperately. He ushers her inside*
ERIKSON
Lovely sister
Paragon of Light
I’m waiting on the collector
Who only comes at night
Lovely sister
I’m waiting for the fall
Standing up or lying down
Or any way at all
To die a man, my back against the wall
CADENCE
Come here, Erik
Let's see this burden you wear
This money you owe...
ERIKSON
Sister, I’ll read it to you...
CADENCE
It can’t be more than four…
ERIKSON
That wouldn't pay for the Burn…
CADENCE
Don’t give them fear
You’re far too eager to fold
What is this coin?…
ERIKSON
I-it's all I have!
CADENCE
That's not my fault!
*there is a fierce knocking at the door*
ERIKSON
Please make them leave!
CADENCE
No more, these lies!
Erik, I’ll make sure you stay alive!
*Erikson answers the knock. It’s Marton *
ERIKSON
Lovely debtor
Waiting in the dark
I’ll have you in for coffee
Oh, we should really talk…
MARTON
Long time short time
I don’t really care
Either way you’re dead today, by my hand I fear
Quickest way’s to throw you off the pier
*Cadence steps forwards*
CADENCE
What haste this is?
What a kind voice you have there
I can’t be sure, but you’re no murderer dear sir
Please spare his life?
MARTON
It’s my job, it must be done
CADENCE
Let's make a deal, I'll give you my service instead
Just think of that!
MARTON
He owes a debt
CADENCE
Just think of that
MARTON
What can you do? He owes a debt.
You’d sell your soul for this poor wretch?
CADENCE
YES!
*Marton leads Cadence to see Natharai at the ‘Slaughtered Lamb’. He head is hung low and the Capos seem pitiless*
BYSTANDER
Lovely sister
Pious to a fault
Sold to the Kamil for a
Man not worth his salt
NATHARAI
Lovely sister,
Why look so aggrieved?
It does not take a lot of savvy
Just to be a thief
Come on, madam
What's a sister for?
*Cadence is shuffled from Capo to Capo as Natharai tries to decide what department she should be assigned to. Finally, she is given to Aleyna for safekeeping*
CHORUS
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
You’re a Holy Paladin
Holy Paladin… but…
What's a sister for?
LILIFRED
Give me the dirt, who's that chick lookin’ cold?
ALEYNA
A bit of narc, she's the one sold her soul
She's got a brother, she handles his debt
LILIFRED
I might have known
There is always some catch
ALEYNA
Lovely sister, come along and join us!
Lovely sister!
TOHU
Come on dearie, why all the fuss?
You're no grander than the rest of us
Life has dropped you at the bottom of the heap
Crime sure does pay…
I make money in my sleep!
ALEYNA
That's right Tohu, show her the lot
It’s time for the sister to show us what she’s got…
LILIFRED
Old men, young men, take 'em as they come
Harbor rats and alley cats and every type of scum
Poor men, rich men, leaders of the land
See them off their rocker and they're never quite as grand
All it takes is money in your hand!
*Campion watches in the background, forlorn*
CAMPION
Pious sister
We have done you wrong
Once I was like you
And did not mean to stay for long
*Cadence is not listening. She writes a letter to Erikson*
CADENCE
Oh no, brother
Please do not feel guilt
I will take the pitfall
For this house of cards you’ve built
Easy money
Killing on the street
Just as well they never see
My shame that’s so complete
Don't they know they've made a deal
With one already dead!
The End of the Rainbow
'The End of the Rainbow' by Richard Thompson
NATHARAI (spoken)
You’re lucky, Miss Greystone. Had it been anyone but Marton given this assignment, your brother would doubtlessly be dead now.
CADENCE (spoken)
I knew that he was kind. He should have just left us alone.
NATHARAI (spoken)
Miss Greystone, you are going to have to learn how the Kamil works if you wish to survive.
CADENCE (spoken)
I do not wish to know how it works! I wish only to save my brother’s life!
*Natharai sighs and rises from his seat. He paces behind Cadence, placing long, spindly hands on the back of her chair. He begins to lecture her calmly (in song)*
NATHARAI
I feel for you, you delicate flower
Safe in the Light’s embrace
No lucky break for you around the corner
Because your master is a monster
And she thinks that you're a pest
And your brother, he's no better than a whore.
Life seems so rosy in the cathedral,
But I'll be your friend I'll tell you what's in store
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
Good men and shallow boys will rob you
And throw you on the side
And all because they love themselves sincerely
And a man holds a bread knife
Up to you throat is four feet wide
And he's anxious just to show you what it's for.
Your parents worked so hard to make you pious
But take a look outside the nursery door
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
And all the sad and empty faces
That pass you on the street
All running in their sleep, all in a dream
Every loving handshake
Is just another man to beat
How your heart aches just to cut him to the core
Life seems so rosy in the cathedral,
But I'll be a friend I'll tell you what's in store
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
Pity the Child
'Pity the Child' from Chess
CADENCE (spoken)
Mr. Campion… I can tell… you’re a good person. You have the light in you. H-how did you ever end up a… a…
CAMPION (spoken)
A criminal?
CADENCE (spoken)
You’re not a criminal.
CAMPION (spoken)
Yes. I am. The world isn’t so black and white, Cadence.
CADENCE (spoken)
Then… tell me. Why?
CAMPION
When I was nine I learned survival
Taught myself not to care
God was my single good companion
Taking my comfort there
Up in my room I prayed in silence
On my own -- never asked for a helping hand
No one would understand
I never asked the pair who fought below
Just in case they said "No."
Pity the child who has attrition
Knows what he wants to do
Knows that he’ll never fufill the mission
Instilled by The Light so true
Pity the child who knew his parents
Saw their faults, saw their love die before his eyes
Pity the child that wise
He never asked "Did I cause your distress?"
Just in case they said "Yes."
When I was grown, my father was killed
And what he burnt I could not rebuild
I didn't miss him -- he made it perfectly clear
I was a fool and probably queer
Fool that I was I thought this would lift
The weight of his words from my sore shoulders
I made the move the moment I crawled away
I was at the Scarlet door
Proof of this faithless oath I swore
To rid me of this sin I abhor
Someone to treat me just the same way as before.
I took the road of least resistance
I had my fate to weigh
I had the urge, and more -- the hunger
Easy to lead astray
Pity the child with no such weapons
No defense, no escape from the ties that bind
Always a step behind
I always blamed him for all I’d done
I was only his son!
Pity the child but not forever
Not if he stays that way
He can get all he ever wanted
If he's prepared to pay
Pity instead the careless zealot!
What he missed
What he lost when he sold his soul
And I wonder does he know…
I never ask. A crazy thing to do
Just in case he’ll accuse…
Your Mother and Mine
'Your Mother and Mine' from Peter Pan
CADENCE (spoken)
YOU have a child!?
ALEYNA (spoken)
Yeah? What’s so weird about that.
CADENCE (spoken)
But you… you’re…. you’re a…
ALEYNA (spoken)
What? I’m a thief? A murderer? A whore?
CADENCE (spoken)
I… I wouldn’t say it in so many words.
ALEYNA (spoken)
What does any of that have to do with being a mother?
CADENCE (spoken)
EVERYTHING! You don’t know the first thing about being a mother!
ALEYNA (spoken)
Sure I do.
CADENCE (spoken)
You… you can’t possibly!
ALEYNA (spoken)
Then tell me how to do it if you’re so smart.
CADENCE
Well, a mother… a real mother
Is the most wonderful person in the world
She's the angel voice that bids you good night
Kisses your cheek, whispers, "Sleep tight"
CADENCE AND ALEYNA
Your mother and mine
Your mother and mine
ALEYNA
The helping hand that guides you along
Whether you're right, whether you're wrong
Your mother and mine
Your mother and mine
*Auroran starts to cry*
CADENCE
What makes mothers all that they are
Might as well ask, "What makes a star?"
Ask your heart to tell you her worth
Your heart will say, "Heaven on earth"
Another word for divine
Your mother and mine
Schadenfreude!
'Schadenfreude!' from Avenue Q
LILIFRED
Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy
CAMPION
I'll say.
LILIFRED
And when I see how sad you are
It sort of makes me...
Happy!
CAMPION
Happy?!
LILIFRED
Sorry, Campy, gnomish nature-
Nothing I can do!
It's...
Schadenfreude!
Making me feel glad that I'm not you.
CAMPION
You’re kind of a bitch, Lilifred
LILIFRED
I didn't say it was nice! But everybody does it!
Do ya’ ever clap when Jarel falls and drops a tray of glasses?
CAMPION
No…
LILIFRED
And ain't it fun to watch Vindicators falling on their asses?
CAMPION
Nope.
LILIFRED
And don'tcha feel all warm and cozy,
Watching people out in the rain?
CAMPION
N-Never.
LILIFRED
That's... Schadenfreude!
People taking pleasure in your pain!
CAMPION
Oh, Schadenfreude, huh?
What's that, some kind of stunty word?
LILIFRED
Yup! It's Goblin for "happiness at the misfortune of others!"
CAMPION
"Happiness at the misfortune of others." That is Goblin.
LILIFRED
Watching a feral druid elf being told she just ate moonkin
Or watching Lazaar realize just what he put his dick in!
CAMPION
Being on the Deeprun Tram when somebody shouts "Hold the door!"?
LILIFRED
"No!!!"
CAMPION
Schadenfreude!
LILIFRED
"Fuck you lady, that's what legs are for!"
CAMPION
Ooh, how about...
Dwarven guards attacked by bees?
LILIFRED
Addicts with exorbitant fees!
CAMPION
Waking golemns from their naps!
LILIFRED
Watching hunters fall in traps!
CAMPION
Argent Dawns getting tackled!
LILIFRED
Undead Ghouls getting shackled!
CAMPION
Watching Natharai never reach-
LILIFRED AND CAMPION
- the ending of his dour speech!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
LILIFRED
The world needs people like you and me who've been knocked around by fate.
'Cause when people see us, they don't want to be us, and that makes them feel great.
CAMPION
Sure!
We provide a vital service to society!
LILIFRED AND CAMPION
You and me!
Schadenfreude!
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
To be!
LILIFRED
S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!
Yeva’s Pledge
‘Dance of the Robe’ from Aida
*the Capos are gathered in the basement in Nagrand. As they await their punishment, the Old Kamil speak in draenic*
LAZAAR (spoken)
Aren’t you afraid that punishing them like this will make them resent you?
YEVA (spoken)
Of course not.
LAZAAR (spoken)
Then you’re a fool.
YEVA (spoken)
Silly Lazshenka. I fear only one thing. I have a ghost watching over me, after all…
YEVA
It's knowing what he wants of me that scares me
It's knowing having followed that I must lead
It's knowing that each person there compares me
To those in my past whom I now succeed
But how can whatever I do for them now
Be enough,
Be enough?
*Yeva imagines herself- young and beautiful again- at the head of a table in Shattrath. Her family is gathered around her. They sing*
FAMILY
Oh Yeva, Oh Yeva!
All we ask of you
Is a lifetime of service, wisdom, courage
To ask more would be selfish
But nothing less will do
Oh Yeva, Oh Yeva!
LURI
You rule should be golden, your rule should be perfect
Instead of this ragged concoction of thieves
But their work has a certain desperate beauty
To give us new life for we'd rather be dead
Than live in the squalor and shame of this world
To the thieves,
To the thieves!
YEVA
Kamil! Kamil!
All I ask of you
Is a lifetime of service, wisdom, courage
To ask more would be selfish
But nothing less will do
Oh Kamil, my children…
*interlude*
YEVA
I know expectations are wild and almost
Beyond your fulfillment but I won't hear
A word of a doubt or see signs of weakness
My nigh on impossible duty is clear
If I can rekindle my ancestors' dreams
It's enough
It's enough
It’s enough!
CHORUS
Oh Yeva, oh Yeva…
Nobody’s Side
'Nobody's Side' from Chess
CADENCE
What's going on around me
Is barely making sense
I need some explanations fast
I see my present partners
In the imperfect tense
And I don't see how we can last
I feel I need a change of cast
Maybe I'm on nobody's side…
And when they give me reasons
To justify each move
It’s getting harder to believe
I know this can't continue
I've still a lot to lose
There must be more I could achieve
But I don't have the nerve to leave.
Everybody's playing the game
But nobody's rules are the same
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALEYNA
Better learn to go it alone
Recognize you're out on your own
Nobody's on nobody's side.
CADENCE
The one I should still think of
Keeps rolling through my mind
And I don't want to let him go
No family’s ever faithful
No contract truly signed
There's nothing certain left to know
And how the cracks begin to show!
AURORAN
Never make a promise or plan
Take a little love where you can
Nobody's on nobody's side
LILIFRED
Never stay too long in your bed
Never use your heart, use your head
Nobody's on nobody's side.
NATHARAI
Never take a stranger's advice
Never let a friend fool you twice
Nobody's on nobody's side
CAMPION
Never be the first to believe
Never be the last to deceive
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALEYNA
And never leave a moment too soon
Never waste a hot afternoon
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALL
Never stay a minute too long
Don't forget the best will be gone
Nobody's on nobody's side.
CADENCE
Better learn to go it alone
Recognize you're out on your own
Nobody's on nobody's side.
This is an incredibly lame (but fun!) concept I picked up from a friend back in Jr. High- the idea is to take a bunch of songs from musicals and rewrite the lyrics (sometimes extensively, sometimes barely at all) to suit other characters and then arrange them as some sort of horrific Frankenstein story.
SO. The plot of Kamil te Kar: The Musical is that Miss Cadence Greystone- holiest of holy Paladins- sells her soul to the mafia to save her brother's life. Initially, she is disgusted by her new coworkers but eventually she learns of their hidden humanity through a series of rousing musical numbers.
I've only a few done so far. If you want to add any songs to the project, feel free! There are definitely some characters in the Kamil that I am not familiar enough with to attribute music to, so have at it!~
_____________________________________________
The Paladin’s Ultimatum
‘Lovely Ladies’ from Les Miserables
*As Cadence makes her way to Erikson’s apartment, she hears whispers in the street*
BYSTANDER
I smell mob debt
Smell it in the air
Think I’ll cut my losses
And leave this alley clear
BYSTANDER 2
It’s that young man
The one with all the smoke
Young man Erikson
He’s ill begotten folk
BOTH
Break some eggs you’re caught with all the yoke
*she knocks and her brother throws open the door, hugging her desperately. He ushers her inside*
ERIKSON
Lovely sister
Paragon of Light
I’m waiting on the collector
Who only comes at night
Lovely sister
I’m waiting for the fall
Standing up or lying down
Or any way at all
To die a man, my back against the wall
CADENCE
Come here, Erik
Let's see this burden you wear
This money you owe...
ERIKSON
Sister, I’ll read it to you...
CADENCE
It can’t be more than four…
ERIKSON
That wouldn't pay for the Burn…
CADENCE
Don’t give them fear
You’re far too eager to fold
What is this coin?…
ERIKSON
I-it's all I have!
CADENCE
That's not my fault!
*there is a fierce knocking at the door*
ERIKSON
Please make them leave!
CADENCE
No more, these lies!
Erik, I’ll make sure you stay alive!
*Erikson answers the knock. It’s Marton *
ERIKSON
Lovely debtor
Waiting in the dark
I’ll have you in for coffee
Oh, we should really talk…
MARTON
Long time short time
I don’t really care
Either way you’re dead today, by my hand I fear
Quickest way’s to throw you off the pier
*Cadence steps forwards*
CADENCE
What haste this is?
What a kind voice you have there
I can’t be sure, but you’re no murderer dear sir
Please spare his life?
MARTON
It’s my job, it must be done
CADENCE
Let's make a deal, I'll give you my service instead
Just think of that!
MARTON
He owes a debt
CADENCE
Just think of that
MARTON
What can you do? He owes a debt.
You’d sell your soul for this poor wretch?
CADENCE
YES!
*Marton leads Cadence to see Natharai at the ‘Slaughtered Lamb’. He head is hung low and the Capos seem pitiless*
BYSTANDER
Lovely sister
Pious to a fault
Sold to the Kamil for a
Man not worth his salt
NATHARAI
Lovely sister,
Why look so aggrieved?
It does not take a lot of savvy
Just to be a thief
Come on, madam
What's a sister for?
*Cadence is shuffled from Capo to Capo as Natharai tries to decide what department she should be assigned to. Finally, she is given to Aleyna for safekeeping*
CHORUS
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
Lovely sister
Holy paladin
You’re a Holy Paladin
Holy Paladin… but…
What's a sister for?
LILIFRED
Give me the dirt, who's that chick lookin’ cold?
ALEYNA
A bit of narc, she's the one sold her soul
She's got a brother, she handles his debt
LILIFRED
I might have known
There is always some catch
ALEYNA
Lovely sister, come along and join us!
Lovely sister!
TOHU
Come on dearie, why all the fuss?
You're no grander than the rest of us
Life has dropped you at the bottom of the heap
Crime sure does pay…
I make money in my sleep!
ALEYNA
That's right Tohu, show her the lot
It’s time for the sister to show us what she’s got…
LILIFRED
Old men, young men, take 'em as they come
Harbor rats and alley cats and every type of scum
Poor men, rich men, leaders of the land
See them off their rocker and they're never quite as grand
All it takes is money in your hand!
*Campion watches in the background, forlorn*
CAMPION
Pious sister
We have done you wrong
Once I was like you
And did not mean to stay for long
*Cadence is not listening. She writes a letter to Erikson*
CADENCE
Oh no, brother
Please do not feel guilt
I will take the pitfall
For this house of cards you’ve built
Easy money
Killing on the street
Just as well they never see
My shame that’s so complete
Don't they know they've made a deal
With one already dead!
_____________________________________________
The End of the Rainbow
'The End of the Rainbow' by Richard Thompson
NATHARAI (spoken)
You’re lucky, Miss Greystone. Had it been anyone but Marton given this assignment, your brother would doubtlessly be dead now.
CADENCE (spoken)
I knew that he was kind. He should have just left us alone.
NATHARAI (spoken)
Miss Greystone, you are going to have to learn how the Kamil works if you wish to survive.
CADENCE (spoken)
I do not wish to know how it works! I wish only to save my brother’s life!
*Natharai sighs and rises from his seat. He paces behind Cadence, placing long, spindly hands on the back of her chair. He begins to lecture her calmly (in song)*
NATHARAI
I feel for you, you delicate flower
Safe in the Light’s embrace
No lucky break for you around the corner
Because your master is a monster
And she thinks that you're a pest
And your brother, he's no better than a whore.
Life seems so rosy in the cathedral,
But I'll be your friend I'll tell you what's in store
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
Good men and shallow boys will rob you
And throw you on the side
And all because they love themselves sincerely
And a man holds a bread knife
Up to you throat is four feet wide
And he's anxious just to show you what it's for.
Your parents worked so hard to make you pious
But take a look outside the nursery door
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
And all the sad and empty faces
That pass you on the street
All running in their sleep, all in a dream
Every loving handshake
Is just another man to beat
How your heart aches just to cut him to the core
Life seems so rosy in the cathedral,
But I'll be a friend I'll tell you what's in store
There's nothing at the end of the rainbow.
There's nothing to be good for anymore
_____________________________________________
Pity the Child
'Pity the Child' from Chess
CADENCE (spoken)
Mr. Campion… I can tell… you’re a good person. You have the light in you. H-how did you ever end up a… a…
CAMPION (spoken)
A criminal?
CADENCE (spoken)
You’re not a criminal.
CAMPION (spoken)
Yes. I am. The world isn’t so black and white, Cadence.
CADENCE (spoken)
Then… tell me. Why?
CAMPION
When I was nine I learned survival
Taught myself not to care
God was my single good companion
Taking my comfort there
Up in my room I prayed in silence
On my own -- never asked for a helping hand
No one would understand
I never asked the pair who fought below
Just in case they said "No."
Pity the child who has attrition
Knows what he wants to do
Knows that he’ll never fufill the mission
Instilled by The Light so true
Pity the child who knew his parents
Saw their faults, saw their love die before his eyes
Pity the child that wise
He never asked "Did I cause your distress?"
Just in case they said "Yes."
When I was grown, my father was killed
And what he burnt I could not rebuild
I didn't miss him -- he made it perfectly clear
I was a fool and probably queer
Fool that I was I thought this would lift
The weight of his words from my sore shoulders
I made the move the moment I crawled away
I was at the Scarlet door
Proof of this faithless oath I swore
To rid me of this sin I abhor
Someone to treat me just the same way as before.
I took the road of least resistance
I had my fate to weigh
I had the urge, and more -- the hunger
Easy to lead astray
Pity the child with no such weapons
No defense, no escape from the ties that bind
Always a step behind
I always blamed him for all I’d done
I was only his son!
Pity the child but not forever
Not if he stays that way
He can get all he ever wanted
If he's prepared to pay
Pity instead the careless zealot!
What he missed
What he lost when he sold his soul
And I wonder does he know…
I never ask. A crazy thing to do
Just in case he’ll accuse…
_____________________________________________
Your Mother and Mine
'Your Mother and Mine' from Peter Pan
CADENCE (spoken)
YOU have a child!?
ALEYNA (spoken)
Yeah? What’s so weird about that.
CADENCE (spoken)
But you… you’re…. you’re a…
ALEYNA (spoken)
What? I’m a thief? A murderer? A whore?
CADENCE (spoken)
I… I wouldn’t say it in so many words.
ALEYNA (spoken)
What does any of that have to do with being a mother?
CADENCE (spoken)
EVERYTHING! You don’t know the first thing about being a mother!
ALEYNA (spoken)
Sure I do.
CADENCE (spoken)
You… you can’t possibly!
ALEYNA (spoken)
Then tell me how to do it if you’re so smart.
CADENCE
Well, a mother… a real mother
Is the most wonderful person in the world
She's the angel voice that bids you good night
Kisses your cheek, whispers, "Sleep tight"
CADENCE AND ALEYNA
Your mother and mine
Your mother and mine
ALEYNA
The helping hand that guides you along
Whether you're right, whether you're wrong
Your mother and mine
Your mother and mine
*Auroran starts to cry*
CADENCE
What makes mothers all that they are
Might as well ask, "What makes a star?"
Ask your heart to tell you her worth
Your heart will say, "Heaven on earth"
Another word for divine
Your mother and mine
_____________________________________________
Schadenfreude!
'Schadenfreude!' from Avenue Q
LILIFRED
Right now you are down and out and feeling really crappy
CAMPION
I'll say.
LILIFRED
And when I see how sad you are
It sort of makes me...
Happy!
CAMPION
Happy?!
LILIFRED
Sorry, Campy, gnomish nature-
Nothing I can do!
It's...
Schadenfreude!
Making me feel glad that I'm not you.
CAMPION
You’re kind of a bitch, Lilifred
LILIFRED
I didn't say it was nice! But everybody does it!
Do ya’ ever clap when Jarel falls and drops a tray of glasses?
CAMPION
No…
LILIFRED
And ain't it fun to watch Vindicators falling on their asses?
CAMPION
Nope.
LILIFRED
And don'tcha feel all warm and cozy,
Watching people out in the rain?
CAMPION
N-Never.
LILIFRED
That's... Schadenfreude!
People taking pleasure in your pain!
CAMPION
Oh, Schadenfreude, huh?
What's that, some kind of stunty word?
LILIFRED
Yup! It's Goblin for "happiness at the misfortune of others!"
CAMPION
"Happiness at the misfortune of others." That is Goblin.
LILIFRED
Watching a feral druid elf being told she just ate moonkin
Or watching Lazaar realize just what he put his dick in!
CAMPION
Being on the Deeprun Tram when somebody shouts "Hold the door!"?
LILIFRED
"No!!!"
CAMPION
Schadenfreude!
LILIFRED
"Fuck you lady, that's what legs are for!"
CAMPION
Ooh, how about...
Dwarven guards attacked by bees?
LILIFRED
Addicts with exorbitant fees!
CAMPION
Waking golemns from their naps!
LILIFRED
Watching hunters fall in traps!
CAMPION
Argent Dawns getting tackled!
LILIFRED
Undead Ghouls getting shackled!
CAMPION
Watching Natharai never reach-
LILIFRED AND CAMPION
- the ending of his dour speech!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
Schadenfreude!
LILIFRED
The world needs people like you and me who've been knocked around by fate.
'Cause when people see us, they don't want to be us, and that makes them feel great.
CAMPION
Sure!
We provide a vital service to society!
LILIFRED AND CAMPION
You and me!
Schadenfreude!
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
Making the world a better place...
To be!
LILIFRED
S-C-H-A-D-E-N-F-R-E-U-D-E!
_____________________________________________
Yeva’s Pledge
‘Dance of the Robe’ from Aida
*the Capos are gathered in the basement in Nagrand. As they await their punishment, the Old Kamil speak in draenic*
LAZAAR (spoken)
Aren’t you afraid that punishing them like this will make them resent you?
YEVA (spoken)
Of course not.
LAZAAR (spoken)
Then you’re a fool.
YEVA (spoken)
Silly Lazshenka. I fear only one thing. I have a ghost watching over me, after all…
YEVA
It's knowing what he wants of me that scares me
It's knowing having followed that I must lead
It's knowing that each person there compares me
To those in my past whom I now succeed
But how can whatever I do for them now
Be enough,
Be enough?
*Yeva imagines herself- young and beautiful again- at the head of a table in Shattrath. Her family is gathered around her. They sing*
FAMILY
Oh Yeva, Oh Yeva!
All we ask of you
Is a lifetime of service, wisdom, courage
To ask more would be selfish
But nothing less will do
Oh Yeva, Oh Yeva!
LURI
You rule should be golden, your rule should be perfect
Instead of this ragged concoction of thieves
But their work has a certain desperate beauty
To give us new life for we'd rather be dead
Than live in the squalor and shame of this world
To the thieves,
To the thieves!
YEVA
Kamil! Kamil!
All I ask of you
Is a lifetime of service, wisdom, courage
To ask more would be selfish
But nothing less will do
Oh Kamil, my children…
*interlude*
YEVA
I know expectations are wild and almost
Beyond your fulfillment but I won't hear
A word of a doubt or see signs of weakness
My nigh on impossible duty is clear
If I can rekindle my ancestors' dreams
It's enough
It's enough
It’s enough!
CHORUS
Oh Yeva, oh Yeva…
_____________________________________________
Nobody’s Side
'Nobody's Side' from Chess
CADENCE
What's going on around me
Is barely making sense
I need some explanations fast
I see my present partners
In the imperfect tense
And I don't see how we can last
I feel I need a change of cast
Maybe I'm on nobody's side…
And when they give me reasons
To justify each move
It’s getting harder to believe
I know this can't continue
I've still a lot to lose
There must be more I could achieve
But I don't have the nerve to leave.
Everybody's playing the game
But nobody's rules are the same
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALEYNA
Better learn to go it alone
Recognize you're out on your own
Nobody's on nobody's side.
CADENCE
The one I should still think of
Keeps rolling through my mind
And I don't want to let him go
No family’s ever faithful
No contract truly signed
There's nothing certain left to know
And how the cracks begin to show!
AURORAN
Never make a promise or plan
Take a little love where you can
Nobody's on nobody's side
LILIFRED
Never stay too long in your bed
Never use your heart, use your head
Nobody's on nobody's side.
NATHARAI
Never take a stranger's advice
Never let a friend fool you twice
Nobody's on nobody's side
CAMPION
Never be the first to believe
Never be the last to deceive
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALEYNA
And never leave a moment too soon
Never waste a hot afternoon
Nobody's on nobody's side
ALL
Never stay a minute too long
Don't forget the best will be gone
Nobody's on nobody's side.
CADENCE
Better learn to go it alone
Recognize you're out on your own
Nobody's on nobody's side.
